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Board index » Street Corner » Outs and One-liners

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emarica
 Post subject: Dealing with hecklers
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 12:46 am 
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Joined: 23 Oct 2005
Posts: 288
post some of your favorite one-liners/ comebcks here..
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fallingblood
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 1:42 am 
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Joined: 24 Jun 2006
Posts: 6622
Location: Penguin's Most Feared Intellect
Don't laugh, it could be your kid.
I remember when I had my first beer.

Just the first two that come to mind. I will add more later on.
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EmeraldOne
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 3:13 am 
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Joined: 02 Sep 2007
Posts: 140
Properly rehearsed tricks should not go wrong. As for hecklers, walk over to them, and give them a shock. While doing so, plant some drugs on them, and then have a confederate call the police, and report the heckler as a drug dealer. It will be awhile before that particular heckler is around to heckle you again.
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mmroczka
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:38 am 
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Joined: 06 Jan 2005
Posts: 476
Location: In some sweet limo, with a hot girl *wakes up and cries*
EmeraldOne wrote:
Properly rehearsed tricks should not go wrong.


O.K. I'm only 15 and that still sounds stupid. The best of the best mess up every now and then, I've seen clips of Copperfield turning over a prediction and having it be WRONG. And Lance flash on some of his stage illusions, I've even seen Mac King forget his next one-liner! So telling this kid that nothing should go wrong if you've practiced is just being ignorant yourself...

I mean...Murphy's law, right?

As far as the question goes...

He wants to be remembered...by anybody.

You'll make money someday, your ignorance is comical

There's only one thing that is keeping me from breaking you in half...I don't want 2 of you!

I've looked high and low for you, I guess I just didn't look low enough...

If Moses had known you, he would have suggested another commandment

I have one nerve, and you're on it!

Some people bring happiness wherever they go. You bring happiness whenever you go!

Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are!

Are you color blind? No? Well I saw the shirt and was wondering...

You must be wearing those clothes to pay off a football bet.

Hope these help,

-Trix
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LakeShoreStrangler
 Post subject: Re: Dealing with hecklers
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 10:11 pm 
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Joined: 09 Sep 2007
Posts: 322
Location: In Los Angeles, California.
emarica wrote:
post some of your favorite one-liners/ comebcks here..


Heckler: I know how you did that!
Magician: Good. That makes two of us...
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nikiel
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 11:18 pm 
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born to perform.

Joined: 19 Jul 2006
Posts: 2338
Location: California
When I look at you I could tell that God has a sense of humor.

I heard you raised the price up to 50 cents a minute. Pretty expensive for a guy like you.

Something smells like Sh!t. Close your mouth.

And the classic:

them: shut up.

you: You Shut up
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flip230
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 6:09 pm 
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Joined: 05 Sep 2007
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Location: The Summit
nikiel wrote:
And the classic:

them: shut up.

you: You Shut up



XD (i seriously laughed out loud at that one
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Bliztmagic
 Post subject: Re: Dealing with hecklers
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 7:36 pm 
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born to perform.

Joined: 21 Feb 2007
Posts: 1581
Location: Your mind
LakeShoreStrangler wrote:
emarica wrote:
post some of your favorite one-liners/ comebcks here..


Heckler: I know how you did that!
Magician: Good. That makes two of us...


haha that's quite funny.
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kyto
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 9:30 pm 
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Joined: 12 May 2007
Posts: 98
Haven’t had to deal with too many hecklers yet, but I got a good one.

Heckler: (ignorant /annoying comment)
You: ok, how about you pick a card?
Heckler: KO... (If they refuse, say "scared?" that might get them to do it)
You: classic force them a blank face card with " f*** you" written on it in big bold letters.
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swatch0
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 11:19 pm 
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born to perform.

Joined: 30 Mar 2007
Posts: 967
Location: Sydney - Australia
Quote:
classic force them a blank face card with " f*** you" written on it in big bold letters
No kidding that is the best one i have ever heard. :lol:
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emarica
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 23, 2007 10:21 pm 
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Joined: 23 Oct 2005
Posts: 288
hahah thanks guys these are great!
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EvanBurak
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 9:32 pm 
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Joined: 07 Sep 2007
Posts: 68
Just don't show them tricks anymore!
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acebrawler73
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 9:41 pm 
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born to perform.

Joined: 27 Dec 2005
Posts: 2333
Location: turlock california
EvanBurak wrote:
Just don't show them tricks anymore!


WOW! awesome oneliner!
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borntopreform
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 9:41 pm 
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born to perform.

Joined: 26 Aug 2007
Posts: 1222
swatch0 wrote:
Quote:
classic force them a blank face card with " f*** you" written on it in big bold letters
No kidding that is the best one i have ever heard. :lol:


haha Must try this
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KyletheGreat
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 9:29 am 
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Joined: 04 Feb 2005
Posts: 1854
Location: Georgia
My favorite to use is always:

Seriously...some things could go without saying...and I wish you were one of them!
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