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 Post subject: Sawing in half one liners
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2007 9:26 pm 
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Penguin

Joined: 06 Sep 2006
Posts: 1
Ok im going to be in a talent show in a couple of weeks and I need some one liners for when i saw the beautiful assitant in half. I dont have any. Any help is greatly apprecitated thanx!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Mar 12, 2007 8:46 pm 
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Joined: 04 May 2005
Posts: 120
Location: In that one dungeon.You know?By Merlin.
maybe something along the lines of "I can turn one assistant into two!"


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 Post subject: haha
PostPosted: Mon Mar 12, 2007 8:52 pm 
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Joined: 11 Nov 2006
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Location: Georgia
if its a female say " well of course im gunna put her back together, 2 parts means twice the misery "

"now gentlemen, you can finally mix and match!"


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2007 2:07 am 
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born to perform.

Joined: 27 Sep 2006
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Location: Everywhere, but no where
She's a busy girl . . . so she needs to split.

Well of course I had better put her back. After all, if she's in 2 pieces the top can get its hair done at the same time that the legs are shoe shopping. That'll make my money vanish.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2007 2:18 pm 
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born to perform.

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Location: In a galaxy somewhere in the vicinity of Betelguese 5
I use Alan Wakeling's version where the lady has a collar with a leash through a hole in the table, and ankle restraints on a leash through another hole at the bottom. Spectators hold these restraint leashes tight, and Alan's patter was "Now, doesn't that give you a sense of power?" I added, "Enjoy it now, cause that power won't last after we put her back together!"

It's not funny, I know, but it just seemed to fit.

I like the other lines thus far, and may have to adapt them in....


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 3:36 pm 
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Right when you're about to do it, pull out a book and say ok, the next step is too... Or something along those lines in patter.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 12:04 am 
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jamesjay1 wrote:
I use Alan Wakeling's version where the lady has a collar with a leash through a hole in the table, and ankle restraints on a leash through another hole at the bottom. Spectators hold these restraint leashes tight, and Alan's patter was "Now, doesn't that give you a sense of power?" I added, "Enjoy it now, cause that power won't last after we put her back together!"

It's not funny, I know, but it just seemed to fit.

I like the other lines thus far, and may have to adapt them in....


James, that's horrible. :evil: Funny, but horrible. :lol:


vstrunk wrote:
Right when you're about to do it, pull out a book and say ok, the next step is too... Or something along those lines in patter.


I do that somethimes with other effects. It gets a big laugh.

If you're going to do it, Make a fake book with something like "The TOTAL Idiot's Guide to Magic" written on the front.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 2:18 pm 
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Location: In a galaxy somewhere in the vicinity of Betelguese 5
Quote:



If you're going to do it, Make a fake book with something like "The TOTAL Idiot's Guide to Magic" written on the front.


I like that! Or just pull out Magic for Dummies......same reaction, I'd wager....


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 2:36 pm 
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jamesjay1 wrote:
Quote:



If you're going to do it, Make a fake book with something like "The TOTAL Idiot's Guide to Magic" written on the front.


I like that! Or just pull out Magic for Dummies......same reaction, I'd wager....


I actually went to the trouble of making a fake book from blank newsprint. That way I can incorporate jokes and predictions into it.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 3:35 pm 
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Location: Las Vegas
I was in the Magic Castle library, and Milt Larsen showed me a nice leather bound book titled "Everything I know about Magic, by Milt Larsen"

As you probably already guessed, all the pages were blank.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 5:17 pm 
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DaveV wrote:
I was in the Magic Castle library, and Milt Larsen showed me a nice leather bound book titled "Everything I know about Magic, by Milt Larsen"

As you probably already guessed, all the pages were blank.


Oh man that's great! I'm making another book.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:16 pm 
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Location: In a galaxy somewhere in the vicinity of Betelguese 5
DaveV wrote:
I was in the Magic Castle library, and Milt Larsen showed me a nice leather bound book titled "Everything I know about Magic, by Milt Larsen"

As you probably already guessed, all the pages were blank.


Now THAT'S funny! has nothing to do with the original post, but I love that...... That's funny right there, I don't care who you are.....

reminds me of the un-PC line from Airplane; "Do you have anything light to read?" wherein the stewardess hands her a pamphlet......you know the rest.......


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 8:21 pm 
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Joined: 26 Mar 2006
Posts: 663
-If this hurts, let me know. Don't hold back; just spill your guts...DOH! Sorry.

-I goofed last time. My assistant was beside herself.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 4:15 pm 
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Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Posts: 62
i do the effect to the point where i have the assistant in the box and i show that there are no trick anything



then i just ask them "do you have insurance" pause for a sec. then say "cause i dont"


gets great laughs and it makes it more dramatic when you are easily able to pull it off


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 8:59 pm 
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Joined: 31 Oct 2006
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Location: Chicago, Illinois
Where can i learn this trick. Its a well kept secret. I wouldnt perfrom it anytime soon but i would love to know how. Is it in Mark Wilson's book because i have that but i didnt see it.


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